A Day With Murphy
By Phil Ramsbottom
If it can go wrong - it will. (Murphy's Law).
In the spring I like to get fit for the summer by doing a series of longish walks, after the recent spell of settled weather I decided that conditions would be ideal for one of them.
But which one? I had done the Three Peaks a week before; my Todmorden meet had accounted for another; I was saving a Llangollen favourite until the wild flowers were out; what about the Five Trigs? Now I can claim no credit at all for thinking this one up, the first time I did it was with Pete Walker but I cannot say where he got it from. Anyway it starts and finishes at Dovestones and takes in the Trig Points Alphin, Featherbed Moss, Black Hill, West Nab and Broadstone Hill giving a mixture of just over twenty miles of good paths and rough trackless moorland.
First thing was to tidy out my rucksack - out came all the winter stuff - torch, gloves, scarf, woolly hat and of course my full set of emergency thermals the weather was so settled I wouldn't need anything like that and it all adds to the weight. I searched around and finally found my shorts and tee shirt. My battered old Sigg bottle came out of the back of the cupboard - much lighter than the flask and more refreshing on a hot day.
So that was me all set, I had an early night and following my tried and trusted method I left home very early to avoid the rush hour traffic, once I'm parked up at the start of the walk I then enjoy a leisurely breakfast.
All went well, my old van started - albeit reluctantly and I travelled through Oldham without the slightest hold up. I hadn't taken much notice of the weather, it had been so settled that I think I had actually started to believe it would last for ever. As I was dropping down the hill from Grasscroft I glanced across the valley towards Alphin - only to see that it wasn't there, obscured by a heavy blanket of cloud hanging over Chew Valley, I then noticed the trees next to the road swaying in a strong wind. As soon as I opened the van door I discovered that not only was the wind strong, it was very cold, and I was dressed in a thin summer tee shirt.
Thinking that this was just early morning mist I rummaged around in my sack and found a thin fleece jacket that I thought would keep me warm once I got moving. Thus prepared I set off, it was cold but as it was before eight I reasoned that it could only get warmer. I am fairly new to using a GPS receiver, I find that many of the functions I am looking for eventually turn up - usually after I have navigated around the menu a couple of times. As I followed the path, which leads from the cottages near Dovestones car park, I was looking down at my GPS to see what I was supposed to press next when suddenly I was lying down looking up at the sky. I had failed to notice the fallen tree, which had blown down across the path - just about head height for me. I got back to my feet, no point in looking around for sympathy it was much too early for 'normal' people to be out, I rubbed my head and carried on. Then I glanced down at my hand to see that it was covered in blood, which simultaneously started to drip off my forehead. I staggered on, wiping the blood off with the back of my hand, luckily I didn't see anybody, they may have seen me but they certainly kept out of my way.
Half way up to Alphin I was in thick cloud and the wind had become even colder, I was just about keeping myself warm but there was nothing to spare and I had no warm clothes left. Nevertheless I battled on, the wind was coming from the east and constantly knocking me off balance but I still thought that it would soon warm up. I pressed on.
First rest was at the second Trig point at Featherbed Moss, here I was forced to resort to my Goretex to keep out the wind - what a difference this made, it was like standing in front of a blazing coal fire. I reached into my sack for a butty to cheer me up, that's when the next problem came along - my butty box so carefully prepared the night before was safe and sound in the fridge at home. Just then my phone rang - it was my wife asking 'is that the idiot who has left his butties at home'. A desperate search of the bottom of my sack unearthed a plastic bag containing a handful of nuts and raisins, I'm not sure how long they had been there but I can recall my brother-in-law Paul refusing to eat them about two years ago because he said that they were decidedly dodgy. They suddenly became the lunch I was eagerly looking forward to.
I consoled myself with a sip from my new drinking tube, only to get a strong taste of bleach from the cleaning fluid that I had used the day before and not rinsed out properly.
I walked on through the mist, passing Laddow Rocks and following the Pennine Way now walking directly into the wind as I followed the stone flags to the third Trig on Black Hill. There was no point stopping there as there was nothing to see and I had nothing to eat. Shortly after Black Hill, I met the first people of the day, a group of youngsters probably doing the Pennine Way, I'm not sure what they made of the bloodstained figure appearing out of the murk but I could tell that they were not interested in passing the time of day. Not long after this the mist started to lift and I could see the Huddersfield road, parked on it was a white truck - or was it a bacon butty caravan? My spirits lifted as I kept it in sight could this be the lucky break that saved the day?
I should have put my glasses on when I first spotted it, as when I was about a quarter of a mile away from the 'bacon butty caravan' the truck started up and drove off.
I carried on up to the fourth Trig point - West Nab, just after here the good paths of the Pennine Way change to completely trackless moorland with a big decision to be made. Do you ignore the warning signs (that tell you that you are crossing behind a rifle range which is used seven days a week) and follow the leat which leads towards the fifth and last Trig on Broadstone Hill, or do you play safe and take a big diversion, which involves tricky map and compass work across a very rough bit of moor?
I sat down with my bag of nuts and raisins and started to think about it. I heard loud noises coming from the direction of Broadstone Hill - bang bang thud thud rat a tat tat..........................
